“Runaway from a G.O.O.D. Man…”

Jesse Boykins III -Runaway Ft. Smoke DZA by Thirteen Itches

Runaway f. Smoke DZA
Jesse Boykins III

“I feel like most of us, try and compromise with love and put ourselves thru relationships that are clearly not good for our health, which drives us to do things to pacify the confusion. When the overall best thing to do is let it go.” – Jesse Boykins III

Those words could have not been said any better; for either males or females too. When listening to Boykin’s rendition of “Runaway” as well as the original by Kanye, one can’t but begin to ponder of the steps in relationships he has seen and/or taken. After a few shots of sake, and a car ride there and back, it came to me that so many people discuss how hard it is to find someone that suits them well, but hardly anyone owns up to how many times they’ve run from someone, or intentionally pushed someone away.

Everyday I read on Twitter and Facebook how relationships are nothing more than a fallacy—something impossible to conjure and hold on to. The concept of a relationship to my generation is something based on perfection, and the moment any angst comes against it, the relationship must be abolished. I hear this mostly from black women nonetheless. After research, which I have done (mostly secretively), I have discovered that at the point the thought is created in the mind of the partner, there is no turning back. Therefore, if you’re thought to be sleeping with you neighbor, to your partner, you are. No questions need be asked. What remains a mystery to me is how, when no questions are asked, can one be so sure of their partner’s infidelity? This is where the track race begins. Instead of falling in love these days, we often times manipulate ways to avoid the situation. We attempt to discover what ever it is we see wrong with the person, and therefore have a way out.

Kanye discussed how bad of a guy he was to date, and that the best option for his mate was to run. If anyone feels him, I feel him… However, there is that woman that each man will encounter in his life that refuses to run. She refuses to believe that he can’t be the guy to settle down; rather he can be “the one.” And as hard as that is to believe for men, it is possible. It takes prayer. Period. I can delve more past that, and say discipline, faith, courage, etc, but that would all tie back to prayer. If we pray, there is no way that we will be lead astray from the right relationship.

Runaway
Kanye West

In the opposing track, Boykins speaks on the age old tale of how many black women runaway from the “good guy” to be with the “bad one.” It is a sad case, but from research, and readings, it seems that so many women firmly believe that they can change a man. However, it is hard to change the man who is constantly running. The man we see in Kanye’s version.

Bringing both tracks together, Boykins character is the guy trying to steal the girl away from ‘Ye’s character. All in all, it is an on going battle, especially in the black community. It seems as if women have been raised to believe that is ok, at times to be mistreated, but they should remain faithful (i.e. the verse from Little Brother’s Phonte on “Breaking My Heart):

Momma was like, “Baby now, I hate to see your tears
But I been with your daddy for bout 35 years
and in my day, I had to
Turn a blind eye to cheatin’
But I ain’t never had to wear no black eyes from beatings
As long as he doin’ right, by you and the kids
How you gon’ expect that man not to be who he is?
I ain’t sayin’ that it’s right, but we often pay the price
Cause a woman’s life is love, a man’s love is life
And he gon’ live it to the fullest,
And I ain’t tryna pull you down, or sound like a broken record
But you should know by now that all! Niggas is dogs
Better to have a rich Pit than a broke German Shepard, uh!

Breakin’ My Heart ft. Lil Wayne
Little Brother

So how does the good guy win, when the psyche of a woman is to think like this? My guess is as good as yours. I know I have not been the perfect example of a good guy, but I have made the necessary steps to change that. The thing is, as Boykins said in the quote, as tough as it may be to do, we must learn to let go of those who are dragging us through the mud. This goes for both men and women. We can’t allow our partners to control our lives. God blessed each of us with a spine, and at some point, it must be used. If not, you will forever be the worm hooked to the end of a fishing reel doing as your master requests you.

Running away is never the right answer, nor is pushing someone to do. Instead, learning how to communicate with your partner your issues will be a much better way to handle the situation. In my case, I wrote two essays for a class, which became some of my deepest thoughts that I had not allowed anyone to know, including my family. Once I shared those thoughts with my significant other, she further understood my transgressions, and was able to help me help her. The proof is in it. At some point you have to realize that you one day must settle down, so as long as you continue to run or push away, you will never meet that goal, because we must remember that God made women out of the rib from man, and therefore, he created someone for the woman to bring her rib to, and a man with a missing rib. The more you push or run away, the further your separate yourself from God’s will.

Photo by Ashley Blakeney at Sartorial Sounds 6/18/11

- @poeticjustiZZ

Jun 22, 2011 | Categories: Article, Music, Poetry | Tags: Ashley Blakeney, Jaren Collins, JCi Creatives, JCi Photography & Design, Jesse Boykins III, Pheno, Photography, Poetic JustiZZ, Runaway, Smoke DZA, The Artistic Insanity, The Asylum | Leave A Comment »